Squeeze the lemons...

My sister-in-law is so funny. Whenever she would get stressed out she would put her palms out by her side face up and say "Squeeze the lemons". While saying it, she would close her eyes and act like she was slowly squeezing lemons with her hands.

This was her guru interpretation. So, whenever I feel stressed out these days, I "Squeeze the lemons". Today, I could have made a bucket of lemonade.

I do not expect to reach this goal tomorrow. I do not know when I will reach it. It could be tomorrow or next week in the lottery, or it could be 3 years from now in a great investment, or it could be 10 years from now when I finally become a famous writer. I have no idea. That is the thrill of it all. That is the thrill of living. That is thrill of this whole thing. That is what faith is.

I have it. I really do have it. BUT, my husband does not. For the second night in a row, we have had another long "conversation" about finances. He assures me that he does not want me to worry with him, for that would just make him worry more. I assure him that I do not have it in me to worry with him.

Then, he mocks me a bit. "It's a little hard to see that everything is going to be alright when there are no calls coming in" This said with his hands kind of flitting around his head. He is basically white as a sheet and as worried as I have ever seen him. Everything is fine for today. And tomorrow. But, he is foreseeing how terrible things are going to be in a few months.

How do you convince someone that everything will be okay if they will have faith? I remember someone that I admire very much telling me many years ago: "If people could just look at their problems from outside of their problems, then they would see the solutions so easily." I didn't know what she meant then. But, I surely do now.

The business IS there. He is just so down right now that he is wallowing in his despair. That is natural, BUT it is doing him no good. I know this feeling. I have been there and have come back. But, it was very hard. It is so frustrating to me that he will not hear me. He does listen, but again, because I am not in the same business that he is in, he seems to think that I do not know what I am talking about.

One of the things that I pointed out to him last night was that this time, maybe the problem had nothing to do with the business at hand. What I did was say that maybe he needed some help to find out how to get help to stop being worried. And that we live in a great time. For, there are resources out there for this. Amazingly, there are resources to help you not worry. That is where I thought he should start. Just start somewhere.

Just type in "How to stop worrying". And there would be a jillion sites to help him. Geez, but I am rambling. SQUEEZE THE LEMONS!!!! I just hate it for him, for the business will come. It always does, but this is as bad as I have ever seen him.

On a different note. I am listening and researching Dave Ramsey right now, with the rest of the country. Glad to know that I am doing, and actually, we are doing some of the things that he says. And for any of you that know Dave Ramsey's story. Well, that is basically our story. We haven't reached quite the bottom he did, but we definitely reached that top level that he did. And that is why I know that we can again.

The first time that we did, we were young. We were very silly with our money. We had the home. The cars and so on. One of the things that I have read about money is that until you are ready for money, you will never be able to hold onto money. Well, I know that I am so ready for it, and to learn how to use it correctly. It holds my interest.

And, AGAIN, for anyone who reads this blog, this is not about the money. It's the journey and all that I am going through on the way there. I repeat this alot for anyone new to it. I am as far from materialistic as they come. Wouldn't seem that way from the title of the blog. I am as blown away by my quest as anyone. But, it is something that I feel that I need to do. It is something that I feel I need to set my sights on. I don't know how to explain it.

And in reading Ramsey's book today, I am seeing that I am going to really have to do some serious readjusting to do it...

Oh, also, for anyone who has been reading... walked 3 miles IN THE RAIN yesterday... that is a big one. My friend called me while I was on my way to Burger King. It made me furious. But, I turned that car around a walked anyway. I was so proud of us!

And, I am still smoking. What to do? Somebody has got to help me on that one. I am going to have to offer a reward or something for that...