Sushi teaches a lesson

I put 20 more dollars into the purse. Yes, I have a purse now. I changed it from the Cash Stash to the purse now. I put aside money into a savings purse "often". Ideally, every day. Then, I stand there not unlike a cartoon character and do a dance of thanks. Reason being, because, really and truly, I am so thankful that I have remembered to save that money that I am putting in there. I wasn't doing that kind of savings a few months ago and now I am. I am reaching me a big time goal here.

And those of you that are not new to my story, you will not be at all surprised to believe that I probably even sing a little bit while at my savings purse. So there I am dancing and a-singing. And, it is looking a-little silly, and I am just not even caring in the least. Reason being, I am happy and I am so unbelievable faithful each time I put that money in that my goal is coming true.

Okay, so that's that.. I had to go into all of that, because my dancing tirade just occured before I sat down and I am a little winded. The dog is, too, for he was running full speed away from me, for it scares the little critter a bit. (Really, I am no Jennifer Lopez.)

But, I am working on the body image. Still trying to get the old body into shape. Still trying to do the walk/run. Trying to eat right... trying to anyway... Oh, oh... get this.. at our local Kroger. . guess what they are selling now.. just guess.. anyone? anyone? Bueller? Bueller? No?

Sushi! Sushi! They are selling Sushi! The ultra cool sushi! Right there at Kroger! I can be ultra cool buying sushi at Kroger! People can see ME buying sushi right here! And guess what....I can't even so much as SMELL sushi without gagging... ughhhh...

But... there I stood... in front of the sushi counter looking at all the sushi .. All the different kinds with the seaweed and the raw tuna and the ginger and all the other stuff I couldn't really look at.. but I did. And there were all the people that I saw walking past me.. Looking at me looking at the sushi. And you just know that they thought that I was just that ultra cool, hip, awesome, far-out mom who was buying sushi. You know that they were wishing they were me. They were wishing that they had my pallette...

So, I reached in and grabbed me some sushi and put it in my basket. Meanwhile, my children were making every groaning noise they could come up with about how completely gross it was. They were making loud announcements about how badly I hated the sushi. I had to use that mom voice, you know the one where you put your lips so close together that they look like they are just one line. I had to say, "Would you please be quiet? Mommy loves sushi now!"

"THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU SAID LAST WEEK! YOU SAID IT WAS DISGUSTING AND YOU DIDN'T KNOW HOW ANYONE WOULD EAT IT!"

Okay, so there were a few bumpy parts in the whole scene, but for the most part, I DID look the chic sushi patron. I had an extra bounce in my step.

So, we carried our step up to the cashier and I made sure that my sushi stayed right on top of our basket. I made sure that it was right on top of the Fruitty Pebbles and Ruffles. I didn't want it to fall over onto the boxes of Dum Dums or Oreos.

While the cashier pulled the sushi out, the young boy who was sacking the groceries said, "Do you eat this?" Now I was ready to shine... "Why, yes I do.." I said it with my nose striaght in the air... He said, "You have got to be kidding me"

Well, that is where the facade ended. He and I busted out laughing, for I had been coming to this Kroger forever, and I just am not the type. I told him, though, he had better put my sushi right on top. Just give me that much. I want to pretend like everyone really does care what I am eating, and that I have a chance of eating it. And that next time I come in, I am going to be wearing my tennis outfit when I get here..

I am going to come in here in my tennis outfit, holding my Starbucks, and I am going to buy me some Sushi... and that is that... "But, Mrs. Neal, you don't drink coffee..."

You would think that matters to me, those things... but the truth is, I really do want to like sushi because so much of the world likes it.. Why can't I like it...? But, for a moment there in Kroger, I felt myself get caught up in thinking, "I wonder if anyone is watching me with my sushi?" Then, I really did think, "I wonder if that is the stupidest thought that I have ever had?"

But, haven't I lived a lot of my life like that? Don't I pick out my clothes based on what others think? Don't I buy my car based on what others think? Don't I think many thoughts based on what others think? Why?

I was telling the sushi story to my mother at her office later that day, and we were all having a big laugh over it. The tennis outfit shortly followed. Then another lady pitched into the story that she would never be caught dead in a Moo-moo.. (If you are unfamiliar with one of these monstors, they are an oversized gown that does/does not zip up the front) For the most part they are considered a bit unattractive by most civilization.

On the other hand, they are considered one of the most comfortable peices of clothing by 99.9% of all who wear them. Then she turned to ask anyone in that office had ever had one.....

Welll...... my mother and I both put up our hands with pride.... This lady just couldn't believe it. No, Kayce, not you! I told her that while wearing a tennis outfit made me feel as hip as Posh Spice, coming home and sliding myself out of it with a crow bar and easing into my ugly moo-moo made me feel like Kayce. And I was proud of it!

Proving that to be embarrassed of yourself is to loose yourself....

But, I do have to say with all honesty, if I had company come over while in the monstor moo-moo, I would have to crank out the reserve sushi and offer them a bite just to offset the moo-mooness a bit. Get us back on some neutral ground....

I wonder how many people are like this....I wonder how many people I see buying all this "fru-fru" ness are doing so just for the looks of it? I know how often I do it, and now I am beginning to see just how unneccessary it is. And I am a little disgusted with myself for it..

I am learning. I can make fun of myself for it, but I can also be quite a bit ashamed about it too. For does a shirt without a lable mean that the person who fills the shirt is not a quality human being? Does a car without a high quality symbol mean that the driver does not have some relevance to offer this world?

Does a person who is not drinking a name brand soda not deserve to sit with those who are drinking a soda that costs 45 cents more? This name game has gotten just a bit out of control...

And where does it stop? It seems that if you want to play tennis, then you should be able to do so in your t-shirt and sweats just as surely as you can in your cute matching stretchy suit. If you want to play basketball, play it in the streets with a broken net just like those who play it in a $5000 a year gym membership.

Want a boyfriend, look for one who is kind and decent on the inside first, not who is wrapped in fine clothes and drives fancy cars from the outside.

I saw a man today as I was leaving in my own car. I was going down the street and he was pulling out of a driveway in what had to be a $75,000 SUV. He obviously didn't see me and he pulled out so quickly without looking that he almost hit me. I honked the horn just in time for him to slam on his breaks. He pulled back into his long drive way quite far.

When I looked back into the rear veiw mirror, he had his head bent over the steering wheel. I turned my car around to make sure that he was okay. At closer look, he was crying. He was really sobbing. I slowed down a bit, but I didn't get out. In this case, I didn't feel it was my place. Maybe it was, but I just didn't know.

There had to be something going on in his life to make him be so absorbed in his thinking as to not look behind him before zooming out of that driveway like that. And then, when I honked, it startled him back into reality. There are endless possibilities as to what that reality could have been.

He could have just been in an argument with his spouse, friend or child. He could have just lost a loved one. He could be in enormous debt and had no way out that he could see.... And the list could go on and on. I would never know.

We all have issues, and it is about us, not what we drive or what we wear, or especially what we eat... Thank God....

And for those of you that like Sushi... I envy you... I really want to...I think maybe it's the soy sauce.... Or maybe it's just the sushi trying to teach me a lesson....